Allow me to elaborate.

The last three sentences were provoked by this blog post.

Wendy warns against the trap of falling into complementarian idolatory. That is, the Christian woman's focus may no longer be a career or fashion, but simply shifting that focus to being a stellar cook and perfect housekeeper is really no better. If Jesus is not the grounds for your actions - you can be sure you've just moved from one idol to another. What's more, if you can't actually play the part of domestic goddess very well, then it can only end in self-condemnation.

But as Wendy reminds us:

Thankfully, God has worked long and hard to free me from finding my identity and self worth in either my job at the community college or my house keeping skills. He has been prying out of my grasp all those things I look to daily for self worth. Instead, He is replacing my quest for identity with the gift of Himself.

Once we understand that the spiritual blessings we have received in Christ are the fundamental basis for all that we are, that God's grace and the promise of eternal life are the reasons why we get up in the morning, then -

I can move from finding either self worth or self condemnation in my home keeping skills. Oddly enough, I usually feel much more equipped to do the things I need to do to keep my home functioning in God-honoring ways once I lose my grip on it in terms of self-identity. I have found that God is pretty jealous and quite willing to frustrate my attempts to find my worth in anything other than His finished work for me on the cross.

So although I'm putting in an unprecedented amount of effort in learning to cook (for reasons spurred on by wanting to be a decent wife and mother because I've accepted that women are to play that role as God intended blah blah), if I fail miserably, I won't mind so much because it doesn't mean that I've been unable to fulfill my ultimate purpose. My ultimate purpose is to glorify God. This is achievable regardless of culinary skills or rather, despite them.

Sometimes I wonder why I try so hard to figure out what it looks like to be a godly woman, whether in ministry or in the family context, etc. There's no formula or perfect model. Really, all I need is someone to shout at me: "Jesus! Follow Jesus! Listen to Jesus! He tells you how to live! Listen and you'll be ok!" I'm pretty sure that's all I need.