But one more thing.

Let us leave pretty women to men devoid of imagination.

- Marcel Proust

A vaguely familiar sensation.

This morning I am bored. I don't think it is a coincidence that my boredom comes the day after my last exam. I slept early last night, so I rose early this morning. There was nothing interesting on television, I flicked through the Telegraph. Bored.

It seems as though the Christian is not ever allowed to say that they are bored. I hear the voice of an entirely hypothetical, stereotypical Christian: "Bored? What do you mean you're bored? If you're bored you're obviously not redeeming your time. Bored? Time is short, go evangelise someone you lazy sod."

Must I always be doing something? Is it overkill for me to feel bad for sitting idle for a few hours? The irony here of course is that I have wasted countless hours on the banality of Facebook. A habit which I am now kicking because I am tired of being controlled by my account rather than the other way around.

I do have a couple of things to think about. The first is the topic of contentment because I have been asked to help write a bible study on it for a women's event. Any books, sermons, blogs, bible passages (apart from the obvious ones) you can recommend on the subject would be appreciated. It is surprising that my concordance only shows four references to the topic in the bible. Paul Grimmond once mentioned in growth groups a concordance that listed where the desired idea or theme you were looking up may be discussed in the bible even if it didn't mention the word specifically. I think that would be quite useful. I was reading through Barbara Hughes' chapter on the Discipline of Contentment last night and was interested by her explanation of how Eve's discontent was stirred by the serpent and finally manifested itself in her rebellion. I'd never have thought to go to the creation story to examine contentment, but there you go.

I'm also planning to finally listen to Claire Smith's Different by Design talks over the break. I'm really looking forward to hearing what she has to say on 1 Timothy, having not actually heard or read a comprehensive and trustworthy complementarian exegesis.

Right. Still bored. I guess I could... No I absolutely could. I could go for a run! I haven't had time for that in ages!

The Road

I watched the film adaptation of Cormac McCarthy's novel The Road last night and I was disturbed. I don't know why it is that movies can affect me this way, I know perfectly well that they are fictional but I can't help but think that there is an element of truth in what I see conveyed.

The Road follows the journey of a father and son heading towards the southern coast of America in the aftermath of an unknown disaster that has left the world almost uninhabitable. There is no food and one of the main obstacles for the father and son is to escape gangs that hunt other human beings because they have turned to cannibalism in their desperation.

The images presented are not overtly gory, but I found close-up shots of hooks not unlike those found in a butchery abhorrent because I knew what it meant. The most disturbing scene of all is one in which the pair break into a basement hoping to find food but instead find humans who have turned into total savages, eating each other and waiting to be eaten by those who have imprisoned them there.

It struck me as evil. Yet I do not think that cannibalism is beyond starving humans, history has already proven that. It seems like the ultimate proof for evolution and the survival of the fittest.

Where does the Christian worldview fit into all of this? There are comments made in the film that if God had made humans he must have turned his back on them long ago, for there was no humanity left.

Perhaps I think way too much. But I was struck by the darkness of the human heart, the potential for evil. We think we know ourselves. But in desperation, what would you do? What might you become? God knows. He knows us truly. And he has forgiven us for it. And for a moment I could not understand why. But that's grace, I guess.

The only people for me are the mad ones.

... and I shambled after as I've been doing all my life after people who interest me, because the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars...

- Jack Kerouac

The fear of God is the beginning of wisdom.

The promise of eternity gives life an objective purpose. It provides meaning for even the most mundane of activities. Christians make this philosophical argument for God often, and I think the counter is that we hold onto this so dearly because we can't handle our own humanity. But it's not about needing a crutch, it's what seems logical if you actually consider the human condition.

The Christian... bus driver, to take Phillip Jensen's example, doesn't waste his life driving from Circular Quay to Central day in day out because every action is performed with the intent to glorify God and serve others. If God is your prime motivation, your work will last into eternity. It has meaning.

But I hear the objections: why can't any old person just enjoy driving a bus? Why can't anybody just be good to others because it makes them happy? Why do you need God to provide meaning? Why are you so hung up on meaning in the first place?

Initially I was stumped by this. I'm surrounded by people who, on the surface at least, are happy with their circumstance, with going out into the world and taking all that they can. And who could blame them? Life is short. Live it. Meaning is what you make it. If you waste your life, that's your business.

But think about this for a minute. The opportunity to go out and 'live out the dream' is only afforded to the upper middle classes of Western society. Sure, they can live happily and ignore that God provides the ultimate meaning for their life, they can ignore the promise of eternity because right now - everything is riches and happiness. Why must God enter the equation?

But for millions, possibly billions of people, their life is nothing but drudgery, misery and a cruel joke if eternity does not exist. The Gospel, the knowledge that Jesus' death and resurrection provides forgiveness of sins and the hope of life eternal can give meaning to the lives of men, women and children who would not have thought it possible. Their lives are immediately transformed and given purpose once they know of eternity.

This is an incredible thought, really. You could spend your life in the most miserable of circumstances, but if you have that hope, if you know God, nothing can break you. And I've read of so many examples of people who have known this truth and lived joyfully in it, regardless of where God has placed them.

Keep your shiny things. Eternity will show them for what they really are. I wish I wasn't so surrounded by the lie!

Odd memory triggers.

I joined WordPress, people. But then was too lazy to make anything of it.

Here are some strange ways in which I am remembering greek words (bear with the transliteration):

peripateo: made me think of peri peri sauce. i walk... to Nando's.
ikanos: i can... sufficient, enough.
palaios: palace... old
krateo: not i grab... i take hold of
klaio: white people cry. asian people cly. i weep. this one made me laugh forever.
enduo: i endure... to put on
peitho: i pethuade... saying persuade with a lisp
tuphlos: it is hard to floss... when you're blind
perisseuo: i abound in sigmas
loipos: loiter... remaining
plousios: surplus... rich

And so on. Sounds ridiculous but it's working.

Also, this post is dedicated to Vincent Chan who apparently reads every one.

If I ever have children...

I'm going to run my fingers through their hair to lull them to sleep every night.